Friday, December 16, 2005

Working through it

Here is the letter I am sending the parent of the child who harassed my son. I don't hold out a lot of hope that the mother will respond appropriately given my experience of her on the telephone last weekend. But I need to start a paper trail going. I fear this will escalate to police/social services.


Dear XXXXXX,

After unsuccessfully attempting to discuss matters with you over the telephone last weekend, I feel compelled to write you this letter. There is a discrepancy in our children's reporting of the events that occurred on Sunday, December 11, 2005 at the ###### sledding hill.

My son maintains that your daughter, ******, both verbally and physically harassed him, pushing him down the hill and causing him to hit his head on the ice. You stated that your daughter claimed my son was the aggressor.

We may never know exactly what happened last Sunday; however, we do have control of what happens from now on. I am formally requesting that your daughter stay away from my son. I have asked my son to avoid contact with your daughter.

My son has reported witnessing prior instances of *****’s verbal and physical aggression and inappropriate language with other children and I am concerned about this pattern of behavior. Both you and your daughter use language that is unacceptable in our home and I don’t wish him to be exposed to it any further.

I expect that you will take this letter seriously and heed my request to have our children stay clear of one another. In the future, if I discover that your daughter has bothered my son in any way, I will be forced to take further action through the ++++++ Police Department, the school system and/or the Department of Social Services.

3 comments:

kristina said...

Needless to say, what happened to your son really saddened me--and then I felt even worse reading about the other child and her mother's response! You're doing what needs to be done, taking care of him, advocating for him---in the face of a lot of obstacles (in particularly the school situation).

Being a parent is indeed more than I had ever bargained for.

Keep fighting the good fight, we are all with you, and him.

mommyguilt said...

Fantastic letter. It is not rude, nor malicious. It is to the point, not placing blame for the initial incident, and simply asking for cooperation in the future. You're doing exactly what your son needs...looking out for him. That's what we do, as parents.

Lisa Cohen said...

Kristina and mommyguilt--thanks for your lovely comments. A month later and I haven't heard a peep from this family. And my son hasn't seen the girl. This is just fine by me.

You should have seen the first draft of my letter. It is unpublishable in public society! LOL.

We're all in a good place right now and I am savoring it, knowing that is doesn't last forever--this momentary balance point. But I'm also not fretting over all the bad things that *could* happen. Just staying in the moment.

Best,
L.